≡ Menu

SAHD Update – First Grade Is Better Than Kindergarten


First GradeHey Readers, It has been a while since I gave an update on RB40Jr. Last year, I wrote more often about our son because we had a lot of problems at the beginning of Kindergarten. He had a difficult time adjusting to the new environment and he hit a few kids (and a teacher once…) It was a tough first year and the school office staff got acquainted with RB40Jr quite well. Fortunately, things got better as he became more familiar with school and made some friends. By the end of the year, he was behaving much better and didn’t get into much trouble. Thankfully, he continues to mostly behave himself in first grade. He still has some issues, but this year has been much smoother than last year. The familiar environment and good friends made a huge difference for him.

Hearing issue

The first problem is a health issue. Earlier this year (March), RB40Jr didn’t do very well with the hearing test at school. We followed up with his primary care physician, ENT, the audiologist, and had many tests done. It turned out there is nerve damage in his inner ear. Now, his left ear has permanent moderate to severe hearing loss. This could come from loud noise, genetic, head trauma, high fever, or a number of things. I really have no idea how it happened. We didn’t notice anything unusual before the problem began. The kid already had selective hearing and we had to repeat ourselves anyway. He got sick a few times, but he didn’t have super high temperature or anything like that. As for family history, my dad and aunt have hearing loss, but that started when they got older. This hearing issue was a big surprise for us because he was fine earlier. I was down for a while, but we got on with it and focused on helping him function normally with the hearing impairment.

hearing aid

It took a long time, but we finally got his hearing aid in October. The audiologist wasn’t sure if this would really help much. In the lab, RB40Jr could detect louder sounds, but had a difficult time making out the words when using just his left ear. The hearing aid would help him a bit, but he’d need to rely on his good right ear to understand what people are saying. I guess any little improvement is better than nothing.

We also got help from school and they have been making  observations to see if he is functioning well in class. From what I’ve seen, RB40Jr seems to be doing okay with his hearing impairment. He speaks well and doesn’t have any speech issue. Sometime when he learns a new word, I’d have to repeat it a few times until he says it back correctly. Other than that, the hearing problem doesn’t seem to be much problem. He is sensitive to loud noises. The school will follow up with us soon with the result of the observations soon.

Anyway, I think he will be okay as long as his hearing doesn’t decline further. He is dealing with it fine for now. The bigger issue is the inability to control his emotions…

Behavior issue

First grade is going much better than kindergarten, but RB40Jr still gets into trouble occasionally. Last week, he got into several scuffles with a boy in class and was sent to the principal’s office on Thursday. He maintained that the other kid started it in every occasion and I believe him. Well, I believe that’s what he perceives. It really could have been an accidental bumping or something like that. RB40Jr insists that the other kid meant to bump him or pushed a chair into him.

You can listen to this while reading the rest of the post. (RIP Tom Petty)

I think RB40Jr’s issue is that he won’t back down. If anyone does something to him, he will get the other kid back, no matter what. Honestly, I don’t know what to do about this. Deep down, I don’t want him to back down either. You need to stand up for yourself to get ahead in life. But, he’ll keep getting into trouble at school if he doesn’t know how to back down occasionally. The teachers don’t care who started it and RB40Jr has a track record. He’ll get sent to the office if there is a scuffle. We need to help him figure out how to control his emotions when something happens and back down when appropriate.

Here is an example. At soccer practice the other day, the kids were playing “kick the ball” away from other guys. One kid kept kicking the ball away from Junior and after 5 times, RB40Jr slugged him in the shoulder. I’m sure there was some contact, but this is sports. You will get hit occasionally. RB40Jr always think the contacts are intentional and he’ll try to get them back. I imagine this is what it’d be like if Kim Jong Un and Donald Trump have a soccer match. He needs to be tough and concentrate on the game instead of try to get revenge.

Changing the default response

RB40Jr’s default response to stress is to hit first and then deal with the consequences later. We’ll need to change his response to think first before hitting. I think this is going to be a tough ordeal for us. RB40Jr has always been a very emotional kid. It is very difficult for him to control his impulse in the moment. I think this is called reactive aggression.

Anyway, we asked the school counselor to do more observations and we’ll see what she thinks. He’ll probably receive a referral to see some kind of professional. I heard Occupational Therapy is really good for these behavioral issues. We’ll see what we can do to help him regulate his emotions better.


Being a Stay-at-home-dad has been much easier since school started. I have time to go to the gym and work on my blog. The separation is good for Junior too. He is learning to be more independent. He is getting better at controlling himself, but it is just a slow process. First grade is a huge improvement from kindergarten, though. Funny enough, many kids are having more problems in first grade. They liked kindergarten much better and don’t like first grade. I think there is more schoolwork and less play now. RB40Jr never liked kindergarten so it’s all about the same for him.

Alright, that’s it for today. Sometimes I wish our kid is more normal and follows directions better, but every kid is different. All in all, he’s a pretty good kid with a rebellious streak. It could be a lot worse. He is doing fine academically so at least that’s good.

***If you don’t have a blog yet, you really should start one. It’s a great way to build your brand and explore different ways to make money online. You can get started in just a few minutes by signing up with SiteGround, one of the top three hosting companies currently. See my tutorial on how to start a blog if you need a little help.

{ 56 comments… add one }
  • Ernie Zelinski October 26, 2017, 1:54 am

    My kid can beat your kid easily. Wait a minute, I don’t have any kids.

    As for me, I have won my last fights by at least half a mile.

    • retirebyforty October 26, 2017, 7:19 am

      Life got a lot more complicated when we had a kid. Sometime I get jealous of people with no kid and their freedom. I wouldn’t have any other way, though.

  • gayle October 26, 2017, 3:18 am

    As your son matures and gets older this problem with other kids will get better. My grandson was the same way, Quinn now is doing great and has a couple really good friends !! They learn how to deal with things and handle their emotions.

    • retirebyforty October 26, 2017, 7:20 am

      The hitting problem is already much better than last year. The school doesn’t tolerate any hitting, though. Thank you for your comment.

  • Ember @ An Intentional Lifestyle October 26, 2017, 3:25 am

    All kids are different and boys tend to be more like that. My husband was an only child and he fought alot during schools, for similar reasons. Looking back, he said he thinks it was because he didn’t have siblings to get him used to those small scuffles. But he survived, and is incredibly smart, well liked, and successful. So don’t stress! Just try to talk w him and help him understand why everything is happening.

    My daughter is in first grade, and she keeps wishing it was kindergarten again. We homeschool and the work load is definitely more. Less easy, more thinking. That’s alot of the issues with 1st grade I think. It’s just more work.

    • retirebyforty October 26, 2017, 7:21 am

      I think you might be right about siblings. It’s tough to spend time with 25 other crazy kids all day.

  • Ms99to1percent October 26, 2017, 3:59 am

    LOL @ “Kim Jong Un and Donald Trump having a soccer match.” That was hilarious.

    On a serious note, sorry to hear about JR’s hearing loss. It sounds like you guys are on top of it.

    Hopefully the behaviour issues will also go away. And I hope that if he’s referred to a specialist, they won’t medicate him?

    Great blog btw, I have been stalking it for couple of days now 🙂

    99to1percent recently posted…How we increased our annual income from $0 to $160K+ to $400,000+

    • retirebyforty October 26, 2017, 7:22 am

      Yeah, that would be a fun match to watch. 🙂
      We’ll say no to medication. His behavior isn’t that bad. It’s just borderline and therapy should help.

  • Pennypincher October 26, 2017, 4:26 am

    Great pic of RB40jr and the fish tank!
    Q: Is he one of the smallest in his class? Sometimes they can be targets for bullies. Bullies always look for the easiest target/any weakness. I totally believe the other kid(s) started it. A policeman once told me, that the instigator will start a fight, turn things around, and all of a sudden, the targeted kid is the guilty one/gets into trouble. Whoa.
    A few tips-I wonder if Jr. would benefit from martial arts. Students are taught not to fight, to just walk away (unless your life if threatened!) and to “kill them w/kindness!” instead.
    I would also limit and monitor any aggression or violence seen in the media-tv, movies, games. Get rid of it all. When Jr. is old enough to “get it”, yoga and meditation is a great help for all ages. Peace! Love! Hope this helps!
    -the Expert. (ha,ha.)

    • Mr. Freaky Frugal October 26, 2017, 4:57 am

      Great ideas Pennypincher!

      My sons took Karate and it helped them become more disciplined and self-controlled.

      I’ve done lots of Zen Meditation and taught it to many other adults. Meditation would definitely help because eventually he would be able to respond to stressful events by first following his breath which would calm him down. Another old-fashioned solution is to count to 10 before you do anything.

      • retirebyforty October 26, 2017, 9:48 am

        I like meditation. It calms your mind, but I don’t think RB40Jr is ready for it. He can’t even sits still at the audiologist. 🙂
        Counting to 10 sounds good in theory, but it doesn’t work either. The kid just respond too quickly. And counting to 10 just takes 1 second for him…

        • Mr. Freaky Frugal October 27, 2017, 2:57 pm

          Count to 20 then? 🙂 Just kidding!

          It really does sound like you’re doing all the right stuff. After raising two – now adult – sons, I think most of the time kids just grow out of this kind of stuff. Their brains mature and then get better at controlling their emotions. I wouldn’t be too worried.

    • retirebyforty October 26, 2017, 7:25 am

      Thanks! A building nearby just renovated their lobby. That fish tank is really cool.
      RB40Jr is one of the smaller kid, but I don’t think that’s a problem. They are all about the same size at this age. Later on, it will be more noticeable.
      We tried martial arts, but he didn’t like the training. It’s like pulling teeth to get him to follow instruction… Maybe we’ll try again when he’s a bit older.

  • Mustard Seed Money October 26, 2017, 4:33 am

    Sounds like Junior is figuring things out. I’d much rather my kiddo push back than get walked over in life. I think in the long run he’ll be much better off 🙂

    • retirebyforty October 26, 2017, 7:26 am

      Right, I prefer that he stands up for himself as well. He just need to figure out how to calm down in some situation.

  • Jeff V October 26, 2017, 4:42 am

    No kid is totally “Normal”, I think. Our daughters have their quirks and issues they have had to work on. (I, on the other hand, was a perfect child, I am sure…)

    Regarding your note at the end, I have thought about starting a blog over the past couple of years, but I have no idea what I would write about. I want to be financially independent, but I have nothing new to add in the field. “We’re both working, spending more than we would like but saving quite a bit” would get repetitive after a while.

    – Jeff

    • retirebyforty October 26, 2017, 9:46 am

      I think you’re right about the “normal” part. Mrs. RB40 lamented that she was such a good kid and listens to all the adult. Why can’t her kid be the same? 🙂
      You’re right about blogging. It can be tough to just focus on one topic like FI. That’s why I write about anything the comes to mind like being a SAHD, taxes, and other topic. It takes a while to find your voice.

  • Ms. Frugal Asian Finance October 26, 2017, 4:56 am

    I hope RB40Jr’s hearing will get better soon. I’m with you in always trying to figure out the root cause of a problem with my kid.

    Whenever Baby FAF gets sick, my first question is always “Why?” If I can find out what the reason is, I think I can better help my son or prevent him from getting sick again. But it’s not always easier to answer the Why.

    I’m glad you have more time to blog and pursue your other passion now that RB40Jr is in first grade. This is such an important milestone!

    • retirebyforty October 26, 2017, 9:47 am

      Unfortunately, it won’t get better. The hearing loss is permanent. There might be some surgery options that could help more, but we’ll wait for him to make that decision when he’s grown up.

  • Mrs. Groovy October 26, 2017, 4:58 am

    I’m glad the hearing issue hasn’t affected Jr’s speech. Do you think he perceives kids are treating him any differently with the hearing aid? Or whether there’s a slight chance he’s a little self-conscious and being more sensitive, or aggressive?

    Probably not the best thing but I’d try it anyway – how about taking the bribe route? “Jr., You make it through X weeks without getting in any trouble and you can have X”.

    • retirebyforty October 26, 2017, 9:50 am

      I don’t think the hearing aid is a big issue. We’ll keep an eye on it. I don’t think the hearing issue is related to the behavior issue. The behavior problem has been there for a long time.
      We tried bribing last year and it worked pretty well. He is doing better this year so no bribe yet. If he gets into trouble every week, then we’ll have to try that again.

  • The Grounded Engineer October 26, 2017, 5:46 am

    I hope everything with junior’s hearing works out… My daughter has one ear that is folded over and so far there are no issues with her hearing it appears to only be cosmetic. But it is scary as a parent when things aren’t normal for your child…

    • retirebyforty October 26, 2017, 9:51 am

      Good luck to you as well. Is there corrective surgery that can fix the cosmetic issue?

  • JP October 26, 2017, 5:49 am

    Yes, Kids’ hearing loss is hard to notice at home because they really get into what they are doing and ignore you.
    Nerve damages affects volume and word discrimination (I have Meniere’s disease), so hearing aids are of little help. BUT, please be very careful with loud sounds, he is more sensitive to certain sounds even though he hears less. This means he can be hurt by a fork hitting a plate, the hissing of the shower, a balloon popping is horrible! Sirens!! If he complains, believe him. He is not exaggerating. Ask him if school is too loud for him; loud places are terrible. Headaches?

    A good friend has a child with a similar situation; the teacher wears a microphone that hangs like a pendent from her neck, that communicates directly to the child’s working ear (at a soft volume). She has to wear ear muffs during the pledge or when announcements are made in the school PA system. After she was diagnosed my friend interviewed me for over 30 minutes to ask about how I deal with it.
    Joe; if you have any questions, please feel free to email me.
    Good luck,

    • retirebyforty October 26, 2017, 9:52 am

      Thank you for your comment. He is sensitive to loud noises especially in a crowded place. He hates it when all the kids are talking in class at the same time. It’s tough.
      I think the microphone will be the next step if he needs it. We’ll see what the evaluation says.

  • Jonathan October 26, 2017, 6:58 am

    Hello Mr. RB40. I have 2 boys 4 and 2 and rough housing is a normal part of their growing. I wouldn’t worry to much about RB40 Jr but for the reputation he is building it is worth taking action. Some teachers seem to have more grace for active kids than others.

    While sometimes we have to remove privileges as appropriate, we try to focus our after action debriefs on situations on grace and forgiveness. No one wants to feel walked over but at the same time fighting is not the answer.

    I try to make statements in my every day conversations like “In this family we forgive others” and “It’s important to have grace for people even when it’s hard” Hopefully I’m building neural pathways that will become habits when they feel wronged it’s good for me too!

    • retirebyforty October 26, 2017, 9:54 am

      His current teacher gives him some leeway. I think he got physical 4-5 times and only got sent to the office once.
      We also remove privileges when he gets into trouble. We rarely hear about it, though. He never tells us anything. I only find out about the scuffles when the counselor called me.

  • Tom @ Dividends Diversify October 26, 2017, 7:16 am

    Sounds like a good kid and good parents. My wife and I have no children, so I admire your commitment, dedication and skills to parenting. Tom

    • retirebyforty October 26, 2017, 9:54 am

      It’s tough being a dad. 🙂

  • GYM October 26, 2017, 7:26 am

    Sorry to hear that RBJR was diagnosed with hearing loss. My mother in law was born with hearing loss in her left ear and she’s done really well despite it. Sounds like you are on the right track to figuring out how to fix his behavior at school, too 🙂 Also, congrats on the more “me” time to focus on your pursuits!

  • Abe Froman October 26, 2017, 8:40 am

    Long time reader.

    We had the same issue with our youngest, unsure if it was willful combativeness, hearing issues or both. It ended up being both – and we were lucky to qualify for some free county supported Speech Path support for a couple months – where they come to the house etc. Doctor suggested tubes (we did not want to do that) but did end up finding out that through some Chiropractic adjustments – his hearing improved —>no kidding !!!! That also helped with not only pronunciation but removed A LOT of the stress he had in not being able to communicate with us (to the ease and level we sought/expected).

    We also have a hit first – think (sometimes) later concern.

    • retirebyforty October 26, 2017, 9:56 am

      Interesting about the chiropractic adjustments. How can that help? I will do some research.
      It’s tough for kids to deal with emotion. Some kids are just more emotional that others. Hopefully, they learn to control themselves better as they get older. It is a lot better this year so I am optimistic.

  • Roseanne October 26, 2017, 9:27 am

    Oh Joe,
    That soccer reference between Trump and whoever, seeking revenge. HAHAHA – thanks for the giggle today. I can totally picture it. Jr does need to learn to control his urges to hit and to deal with anger in general. I mean, it is a part of life. As an engineer you couldn’t slug your boss if you disagree. You have to learn to use your words, and you can model that at home. You get angry and you then calmly say that you are angry and why, right?! ~smile~ Roseanne

    • retirebyforty October 26, 2017, 9:58 am

      It’s hard to control yourself when you’re angry. I yell at him sometime, but I never hit him. Setting good example is very important. I need to stay calm in those situation, but it’s tough…

  • Mr. ATm October 26, 2017, 9:50 am

    Hi Joe,

    Very sorry to hear about Jr’s hearing problem. I’ve not been following your blog closely, so I don’t know when the problem first started.

    One of the main challenges with hearing problem is it is very difficult to figure out what caused it in the first place, unless there were some obvious signs such as ear infection or extended exposure to loud noise/music.

    Once the damage is done, there is not much doctors can do to reverse it, especially if significant time has passed. There is a steroid based solution that can revive hearing if it is applied within a 4 week window of first symptoms. After that, hearing loss becomes permanent.

    Also, there is no such thing as LASIK for ears. The other issue with hearing or ear disorder problem is it comes with side effects such as tinnitus, hyperacusis (sensitivity to loud noise as JP mentioned), and the worst of all is vertigo (a key symptom of Meniere’s disease).

    I know a very good ENT specialist (Dr. Furr), he is also a surgeon. He sits at PDXENT. I would recommend getting MRI to rule out any serious cause and then Allergy Test (you can have it done at PDXENT). Allergies are known to cause problems in inner ear as autoimmune becomes hyperactive and start damaging hair cells in our inner ear.

    Hope this helps, you can also email me if you need more info.

    Take care and good luck to you and Jr.
    Mr. ATM

    • retirebyforty October 27, 2017, 8:45 am

      Thank you for your comment. We had an MRI and they didn’t find anything. I will check on the allergy test. He has seasonal allergy, but that’s about it.

  • Angela @ Tread Lightly, Retire Early October 26, 2017, 12:22 pm

    Damn. I’m sorry to the hearing damage is permanent. Going on 6 months moderate/severe hearing loss, I can tell you that it’s annoying, but you do get used to it for the most part. As long as no one is on my right side/there aren’t loud noises in the background, I do okay. Just want to give some support to the little guy and know it really hasn’t had a huge impact on my life, just mostly annoying 🙂

  • Greg October 26, 2017, 3:09 pm

    A “normal” kid? Do they actually exist. Start looking at it, and all kids (and adults too) seem to have underlying issues, some more evident than others. Both of my now-grown kids were kinda “normal”, but both also had issues. Comes with the territory. Enjoy it!

  • Lily @ The Frugal Gene October 26, 2017, 3:33 pm

    RB40 Jr sounds like a solid kid. By the time he’s older, medical advances would probably take care of any further issues with his hearing.

    It’s important to not back down in the face of things, I agree, that attitude is going to be more useful later on. I was(?) a very stubborn kid – if anyone ticked me off, I’d get them too. Eventually I realized it’s goes along with a strong sense of justice which I believe was the cause of my anger. The world isn’t a fair place so I’m still full of anger – even though my life is just dandy.

    All in all, I can relate. I’ve smacked a few kids before and I don’t really regret it haha…I didn’t want to be the pushover everyone think I was just because I’m small, female, Asian and demure looking.

    • retirebyforty October 27, 2017, 8:48 am

      I really hope so. I need to do some research to see if there are anything that can help. He is functioning okay so it can wait a bit.
      Yeah, that strong sense of justice isn’t very useful. I kept telling Junior that the world is not fair and you just need to work with it. 🙂

  • Mr. Tako October 26, 2017, 6:37 pm

    Hi Joe — good to hear RB40Jr is doing better in school. My son is kinda similar. He doesn’t listen terribly well and responds to stress by getting even more agitated. It’s difficult to know what to do.
    Over time I hope my son will learn more emotional control. We start kindergarten next year, and I’m crossing my fingers that things go OK.

    • retirebyforty October 27, 2017, 8:49 am

      I’m pretty sure it is some kind of chemical response. Some kid just have more of it than others. We’ll just have to keep working on it.

  • Lily October 26, 2017, 8:38 pm

    Hi Joe, sorry to hear about Junior’s hearing loss. But you guys are helping him so I’m sure things are going to be better and Junior can handle it.

    As for the behavior problem, I actually teach K to walk away from bullies instead of confronting them. K ran into a couple of bullies already this year, so we talked about tactics. 1) Always try to avoid/ walk away from troublemakers first. 2) But if the bullies threaten her or her friends, then she needs to be ready to DEFEND (verbally and physically). We gotta choose our battles. Let’s talk more in person in December.


    • retirebyforty October 27, 2017, 8:51 am

      I tell Junior to avoid certain kids too, but it doesn’t always work. There are not a lot of space at the classroom and playground.

  • Stockbeard October 26, 2017, 8:58 pm

    Hey Joe, I don’t know if this will help but it sounds to me that JR is just reacting “strongly” to what he perceives as being bullied (or injustice, as others have mentioned above me). As a kid, there were multiple times were I felt I was being bullied, simply because I was smaller/weaker than the other kids (bear in mind: that was my perception. From the bigger kids’ perspective, maybe we were all just “having fun”*).

    I grew out of my anger by realizing that there were other kids being bullied even more than me, and trying as much as possible to help them rather than feel sorry for myself.

    So here’s my sneaky suggestion: maybe JR could be able to funnel his anger into more righteous battles, such as helping smaller kids 🙂

    Ha, then again, not sure how one would guide their kid to do that, but a huge part of me brushing off the bullying as a kid/teenager was to realize there were other people suffering much more than me, and starting feeling sorry/angry for others rather than for myself.

    A friend of ours also just got news from the doctor that their 5 year old needs hearing aid, most likely on both ears. Good luck going through this, but also remember the happiness treadmill effect: after a while, for you and your son, this will be “everyday life”, and I honestly think it’s one of the least “life-impacting” medical conditions out there. I’d be surprised if there was any study out there saying that people needing hearing-aid are fundamentally less happy than others 🙂

    * I have this theory that bullies in general don’t realize that they are bullies

    • retirebyforty October 27, 2017, 8:54 am

      Thanks for your comment. I will talk to him more about this. He said there are certain kids that are “crazy.” But I’m not sure what that mean. Sounds like being a little kid to me, but maybe they are bullies.
      You’re right about the hearing loss. It’s not a big deal for now because his right ear is good. Hopefully, his left ear is stable now and doesn’t deteriorate further.

  • [email protected] October 27, 2017, 6:30 am

    Hi Joe,
    Thanks for the update. After being the principal at that level for 7 years, I have some materials I can send you that might help your little guy with the scuffling at school. I’ll send them your way after FinCon. Glad the hearing issue was found as that can be the root of other problems too. Wish you were here in Dallas!

    • retirebyforty October 27, 2017, 8:56 am

      It’d be great to get some materials from you. Have fun at FinCon! Sorry we didn’t make it this year. I’d love to meet you in person.

  • Kris October 27, 2017, 2:32 pm

    I think when your son gets older and matures, he will figure out when it’s worth backing down and standing up for yourself instead of always defending himself when he thinks he getting ‘bullied’. After all the altercations he had, he may realize that he has a reputation of always fighting for himself and thus the other classmates can try to be friends instead of battling each other.
    I have a 19 month old boy and it’s good to read posts like yours so I can know what other parents are going through when their kid(s) are starting out in school.
    Sorry about his hearing issue, good thing it was discovered at that hearing test so you guys were able to take care of it.

  • Laura October 27, 2017, 2:52 pm

    Glad to hear he’s doing better! And I know how frustrating it is when the office staff knows your child on a first name basis and what it’s like to get calls from them regularly…and not about good stuff :/

  • k. McGarrett October 27, 2017, 4:07 pm

    I’ve worked with students with a hearing loss (as a teacher) as well as others with learning challenges. Some hearing students had cochlear implants. My school (regular elementary school) had a hearing program with specially trained Educational Assistants providing some support. There was a hearing teacher and various other supports in place and also a sound field amplification system in all classrooms. You’ll have to become knowledgeable about all of it!

  • Mrs F October 28, 2017, 1:59 pm

    Hi. Long time reader, but first time poster. (Hey, what can I say? I’m was the kid in the back always paying attention but trying to disappear from the room).

    My son had a lot of trouble with the same issues, his perception that he’s always the one slighted, not keeping his hands to himself, etc. His teachers are always commenting on his lack of “maturity” (My question back to them is always: Well, do you have any recommendations on how to ‘teach’ maturity? Seriously…) He’s now in 3rd grade. I do agree that with time and experience, things mellow out. But what helped him in the meantime was occupational therapy. This is how I found out that he has sensory processing disorder. They also work with him from an emotional standpoint. They also set up some group sessions which I think was helpful. It has given him the more in his ‘toolkit’ to manage social situations that he has trouble with. One caveat is that insurance may not cover and it is pretty expensive out of pocket. I can’t say that it is accelerating his ‘maturity’ or *significantly* increasing his self-regulation, but at least it *feels* like I am doing something else about it. (i.e. not feeling so ‘helpless’ as a parent sometimes is sometimes worth the price).
    Anyhow, I’m not suggesting to get your kid checked out. I’m not a professional, so please just take this as my experience with my kid. If I get trolled, I’ll just hide in the background again. 🙂

    • retirebyforty October 28, 2017, 5:58 pm

      I have heard good things about occupational therapy. We’ll see what the counselor think. He is getting somewhat better so I’m hopeful. Seems to me other kids in his class are also having a difficult time controlling themselves.
      Thanks for your comment.

  • Ken Giles October 28, 2017, 9:30 pm

    Hey Joe,

    Did they do newborn hearing screening when he was born?

    Wonder if things would be different if caught earlier.

    • retirebyforty October 28, 2017, 9:37 pm

      They did newborn hearing screening. They also check the hearing when we go in for our annual visit. He did fine earlier so we’re not sure what happened.

  • Mr. Groovy October 30, 2017, 5:52 am

    “I imagine this is what it’d be like if Kim Jong Un and Donald Trump have a soccer match.”

    LOL! Nice analogy, Joe. Made my Monday morning. Glad RB40Jr’s hearing issue was discovered before it became an issue. And I’m glad his behavior is improving, although I do admire his “take-no-crap” instincts. Thanks for sharing, my friend.

Leave a Comment